Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in wheelchairz's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, November 10th, 2005
1:32 am	BIGOTS person 1: you're a bigot person 2: what's THAAAAAAAAAT? person 1: oh you know. you are one. person 2: IS THAT SOMEONE THAT DRINKS BEERS?! person 1: ... HOW CAN PEOPLE BE SO FUCKING STUPID? SERIOUSLY WHAT THE FUCK. GODDAMNIT WHAT A FUCKING MORON. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, October 27th, 2005
2:53 am	emedicine case An 82-year-old man presents to the clinic with progressive difficulty swallowing and dysphagia over the last several weeks. He has been unable to eat food or drink water for the last 6 days and is thirsty. He denies odynophagia but reports that his speech has become slurred concurrently with his other difficulties. He denies having motor or sensory deficits, headache, fevers, urinary symptoms, malaise, or fatigue. On physical examination, the patient's vital signs are normal with a heart rate of 78 beats per minute and a blood pressure of 132/67 mm Hg. Pulse oximetry is 98% on room air. He has slurred speech. Examination of the head and neck reveals a normal oropharynx with intact tongue movements and a preserved gag reflex. However, the patient has bilateral, symmetric palpebral ptosis with a masklike face. In addition, he has to tilt his head back to look straight ahead. Because of an inability to lift his eyelids, he seems to be furrowing his eyebrows to compensate. The patient has normal motor strength, including strength in the extensors of his wrist and deltoids. He has intact sensation in his extremities and symmetric and normal deep tendon reflexes, and he can walk with no pronator drift. The patient has no difficulty breathing. What is the diagnosis? ------------------------------------- this one got me, but i think they all get me. i think it might have something to do with the nucleus ambiguous or that one tract that carries fibers from III...i think it starts with an E? anyone? this stupid website doesn't have the answer and i get these puzzles that i'm too stupid to figure out in my email box every month. (12 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 24th, 2005
9:13 am	i'm really into talking about how things have "moderned up" (12 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 18th, 2005
2:43 pm	i had a dream about the tv show roseanne. remember how the last season of the show was basically a dream sequence, and they never really won the lottery, and that the dad was dead? in my dream, it was magically the next season of the show, except it was real life and not a show. then i was hanging out with them and they had roseanne as the mom, and also another generic mom. we all went to the movies and the generic mom disappeared. i said "hey guys don't worry...what if this whole season is just a dream and she's really not dead and darlene is really a lesbian? eh? eh?" and they didn't like that (Comment on this)
Saturday, October 15th, 2005
9:56 am	Yesterday, I was supposed to try and get some work done. Instead, Bobbye came over after lunch and we watched Dazed and Confused and sat around like jerks until I decided I needed to take a nap. So I went and took one. I had a dream about some girl vomitting in my mouth on accident and then feeling bad about it. We were supposed to make dinner, but instead we did the jerk thing and went and picked up food. We came back here and made Bloody Marys with Jace and Chelsea, and I drank one of those Purple Passion 2 liters while they argued about the Civil War and racism or something. We went to some party that had a slip-n-slide, which was sorta lame. We went to another party where naked frat bros were jumping into a pool. On the walk to the party I passed this crying girl on the curb who was telling her friends "OMG I JUST DONT FEEL LIKE I FIT IN AT THIS PARTY" and she was crying and I just wanted to scoop her right up into my pocket and throw her into a fire. A bunch of slutty sluts were walking around saying OMGSODRUNK and then stumbling around a little. Some faggoty cowboy cut me in line for beer, and I started screaming WHY I GOTTA WAIT AT THE END OF THE LINE? ITS CUZ I'M COLORED, DAWG to these mexican thuggggggzzzzzz behind me and they thought it was a funny joke. That party was so...something and I decided in my mind that I don't like mosquitos enough to go to one like that again. They had a shot block and a million kegs and it smelled bad and there were fat chicks who were all like "HEY HERES BOOBS" and a bunch of kegs and naked dudes jumping off a roof into a pool. They were all "MY DICK IS COVERED BY A SOMBRERO, BUT NOT WHEN I JUMP YAHHHHHH PUBES" When it started to get real fucking stupid then I didn't think I could handle it anymore and me and Jace took off. My conversations with people at these parties are all me going "yeah...um heyyy hi" and then trying to get away. Especially when this dude who I keep trying to avoid comes up and was like "hey man. your band needs to play a cover Vagina by the Bloodhound Gang. You know...with the falsetto and stuff? That would go over really well...like at a houseparty, not a bar so much. Everyone would really LOVE IT." I just felt embarassed for this dude, as a dude, and I hope I'm never wrangled into a conversation with that faggot ever again. God I never want to be anywhere were a lot of people enjoy that. Seriously, Fuck off, maaaaaaaan. Afterwards, we met up with thugs in an alley. They said "yo man hit me up on the low." Maybe we WILL. This encounter was follwed by watching all the Mr. Show and making jokes about things and eating burgers. This morning I woke up to an empty house because everyone went to Austin and Dallas. I think I might come up to Austin in February or March to look for apartments or something. Around that time I'll probably solicit help from my friends and ask them if they know any moderately cheap places for one moderately shitty dude to live for a while. Thx. Current Mood: kwashiorkor Current Music: MF Doom - He ill (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 10th, 2005
1:38 am	Use the spraycan tool to shade his fat, stupid eyes. The night before a test, I can never sleep. I spent the last 30 minutes trying to draw a kid with Down's Syndrome on MSPaint. Today I went to the beach for a while and sat around and watched happy couples take walks and little families play with dogs and I read my books and didn't realize that my bag was getting soaked by the wet sand. Sometimes I don't pay attention to things, and I feel like that guy Mike from American Movie who likes Metallica and drugs. Tomorrow we all have to go to some abdominal exam workshop, and I have to dress professionally. I really hate when they make us dress professionally for stuff like this, because there's really no patients and there's going to be a million people crammed in a hot room learning how to listen to bowel sounds. I'm not smart enough to realize why I need to be wearing a tie for that. It's alright though, because sometimes it helps me feel good if I'm wearing nice clothes. I need a new bowtie. That is my life. If that isn't hotter than rubbing aspirin on a dick, I don't know what is. Current Mood: Oh Precious Current Music: Tupac - Bought This Candy, Can't Eat It Cuz Diabetes (Comment on this)
Saturday, October 8th, 2005
10:56 am	I woke up this morning and took a shower and got dressed and stuff, and I realized I was matching. Real faggy light blue matching too. This means it'll be a good day. Last night was funny, because Jace and Chelsea came over and we were all ready to study and eat some bullshit, but then Bobbye came over and she was dressed to go out. Too much time later, we were still conflicted as to what to do, so everyone left and I went to sleep. I had really weird dreams about everyone having to congregate in this cafeteria/shoestore where all our shoes were. Everyone found their shoes before me, so I stayed after. The guy that owned the store was this thug and said if I didn't find my shoes, I could just take some other shoes. So I got these giant hightops with jewels in them and then played NBA JAM TE on the projection screen inside after another thug came in. My real life is not real like this, but one day, it will be close. If it doesn't, maybe I'll just hang myself with a puppy's leash. Current Mood: VITAMIN C 1000 MG Current Music: The Slits - FM (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 3rd, 2005
7:04 pm	hey guys i just made some shake and bake. thats pretty much all thats going on in my life. i ate a little bit of cheddar and then this weekend i went to cocktails and sang montell jordan with a bunch of white trash gays. Current Mood: Mousepaddick Current Music: Journey - Dick Made of Mousepads (Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 28th, 2005
11:23 pm	i went to austin then i came back? it was uneventful, but we went to that beerland karaoke thing and were obnoxious. then i turned mean. im boring with no jokes now (Comment on this)
Monday, September 26th, 2005
4:49 pm	for a weird reason i want to go to galveston now and i dont think i like being in austin unless i live here. i went to some boring parties that were boring and then i went to sleep. but the sleeping was good because i had good dreams about getting HIV from a needle on a movie theater seat welcome to the world of aids. i went to miltos with bobbye today and it was good and id never been there before. i think some people are doing beerland karaoke tonight too so call if you want to. i'm going to go to galveston wednesday afternoon and wont come back to austin for a while i hope. i went to acl and it was very hot but i liked that because it made me feel like i was swimming in a pool of filth and neckbeards and heroes. i jus' don' undehrstend. I AM THE MAN OF THE HOUSE! so she does what i say (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 22nd, 2005
6:58 am	ive been in austin since the other day and i partied with mike and we walked really far. mike told a bum to fuck off or something, and then he ate those 6 nasty burgers at dennys. then the next day we saw a motorcade. in the evening after walking around and eating food with mike and rhonda, i ran into stephanie and allie who came to our radio show a few years ago. they came out and hung out with liz and louisa and nathan and their friend krisque and we listened to RANCH RANCH and CRAZY CLOCK and said funny jokes. today im at kanays and hussain is coming here and we're gonna go get drinks now. anyone want to hang out? call me and get "ALL CIRCUITS BUSY" you guys are my friends hi (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 20th, 2005
6:36 pm	hey does anyone in austin want to hang out this week for my birthday? its kinda gay being like "hey its my birthday and YOU should celebrate it," but i have to leave from hurricane town and i have nothing to do in austin besides sit at the ugl and study till sunday. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, September 18th, 2005
11:25 pm	my life is pretty much reduced to playing starcraft and listening to "your love" by outfield over and over again. why am i such a faggot (2 Comments |Comment on this)
1:28 am	hey im sitting here. hey guys. whats up keep it real, niggers. tehre are no niggers in real life. thats a STATE OF MIND. thats like people that pick cotton and shit. and no one picks cotton anymore cotton just appears in the textile factories of pakistan and korea HEY GUYS WE PLAYED A SHOW TONIGTH AND I GOT FERE BEER (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 15th, 2005
9:05 am	i know you dig on vintage yesterday, before telling me that she wanted to lose 100 more pounds and she's trying real hard, this real annoying girl said "excuse me, but i'm a sucker for guys with green eyes" and then trapped me in this shitty conversation about ben harper for too long. she wouldnt even go away when i pointed in some random direction in the crowded bar and said "my girlfriend is over there somewhere." the girl was just WAY.TOO.SHITTY. WIZ WIT also, i got a flyer for a new store that sells "goth/punk/vintage" or something like that. The guy who handed me the flyer said "Hey man, I know you dig on vintage" DO I? Current Mood: stomach perm Current Music: The Outfield - Your Love (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, September 12th, 2005
5:15 pm	had a boring weekend of watching tv and eating mexican food. last night i went to karaoke again. i think i'm going to start going by myself because its my thing to go by myself. i like doing most things by myself lately too. i like when my friends hang out but for some reason lately i like to hiiiiiiiiiiide i think i will hide forever. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, September 10th, 2005
12:12 pm	like spraying febreeze on a turd i can finally move my neck again. this is important if i ever want to look left. yesterday jace and chelsea and me went to eat mexican food and my dinner was big and came on 2 plates. 2 plates. jesus. then chelsea paid for all of us and it was nice. then we tried to watch batman and we all got tired after eating ice cream so they went home. also whenever i go into a store, they think i'm stealing. like when i went with jenn and her friend becca to that halloween store near nyu the other day and every shitty goth dude in the world who worked there followed us around and was like CAN I HELP YOU and arranged stupid rubber masks around us while we looked at harry potter scarves. fuck that. they also made some loudspeaker announcement that said "dont twirl batons blah blah fags" after i twirled a baton. hi i'm 50 and i work in a halloween costume store. geesh. i found out i passed my class, so that was pleasant. hopefully i'll pass the next one too. i think its going to be more annoying, but thats alright because i'm ready for it and stuff. i bought a watch yesterday because it was 10 dollars, and its from BUM equipment. remember BUM equipment shirts? yeahhhhh. i want to cook a bunch of indian food this week or next. we'll have a little party. everyone should come to it. Current Mood: globes Current Music: its 1999 my nigga (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 9th, 2005
12:32 am	hah i just got back from this vacation. there are pictures somewhere. i ate some racist cheesesteaks. tonight i got home and went to some burlesque show after karaoke with chelsea and jace. this old woman flopped her tits around like it wasn't no thing. i sang some luther because luther is dead. now i'm gonna sleep like a golden monster (Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 6th, 2005
1:09 pm	HEY I'm at John and Jenn's at NYC and we're getting CRAZZYYYYYY yesterday we sat on a roof and drank juice and it was pretty good. also valerie was there. also a million dudes. we're going to BBQ now and we're gonna do partyyyyy hey why u gotta do me like that girl? what babies gotta eat babies GOTTA eat (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, September 2nd, 2005
11:02 pm	there were so many cans there at this church. if anyones in town next weekend, lets go lend stethoscopes and our inability to use them properly to those dudes whose pants could not have been high enough. (1 Comment |Comment on this)